How do I deal with grief?
Unresolved grief hides itself well or so we tell ourselves but there comes a time when letting go and living positively is right for you. Grief is most commonly associated with death of a loved one, or a pet. However it can also start as soon as we or a loved one receives a life-limiting medical diagnosis, losing a job, divorce (ourselves or parents) or something more personal to you. It can manifest as any number of behaviours anxiety, overwhelm, sadness, depression, smoking , drinking, substance abuse, anger, loss of motivation and weight loss to name a few.
We may have well-meaning relatives, friends, work colleagues offering us a shoulder to cry on, sometimes their emotions and own sense of mortality with the situation can affect their interaction with you. They may withdraw as they don’t know what to say or do or be constantly in your face and offering you somewhat unhelpful advice or trying to keep you busy, so you want to withdraw, which then gets everyone more worried about you and how you’re coping.
Grief is a process to go through. There is no right way to do it or prescribed length of time but there are phases that everyone goes through and we can flip flop between all these phases, sometimes just for an instant and in no particular order.
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, a Swiss psychiatrist published a book in 1969 called “On Death and Dying” where she describes her 5 Stages of Grief Model as :
1. Denial - you may feel a little numb because of the negative feeling
2. Anger - you may want to blame yourself, someone or something
3. Bargaining - you may start to pick a point in time when it will all be over
4. Depression - you may feel sadness, regret, uncertainty, loss of identity but you are starting to accept
5. Acceptance - you feel some emotional detachment and this often comes before the people around you.
There are techniques which we use in Hypnotherapy and Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) to enable you to
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rapidly and effectively reach acceptance and peace calmly,
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if the loss was traumatic, we can detraumatise those memories comfortably so you can feel free to grieve properly,
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learn how to communicate effectively with yourself and others so you can live everyday as your true self without guilt and
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make every day count with the things that matter and you love the most.
If you would like more information on the benefits of Hypnosis for grief please do not hesitate to contact me for a confidential obligation free discussion.
Contact your GP or go to www.qld.gov.au/health/support/loss for online information and services for dealing with loss and bereavement.
Diane Kirkham - Master Clinical Hypnotherapist and Master NLP Practitioner Brisbane. Over 35 years experience as a medical professional. I am passionate about enabling you to live your life optimally and happily.
